Charisse Deschenes (00:31)
Welcome back to another episode of Unmuted, where today we're talking about when the sparks fill dim and we show up anyway, where we strip away the noise and reconnect with what makes us human. I want to begin with some honesty. I'm not feeling especially inspired today. I'm worn down and I'm tired and my head is not clear. I don't feel bright as I usually do. Yet here I am.
Kellye Mazzoli (00:54)
And I'm really glad that you are, Charisse, you know, because I have a feeling that this episode today is going to be about real life. The truth is, you know, there are some days where we feel really lit up and there are some days where we don't. So I don't want to tell you that the answer to this is to fake it till you make it. I think the answer really is to show up anyway, which is exactly what you're doing. So today.
Charisse Deschenes (01:03)
Ha
Kellye Mazzoli (01:23)
instead of talking about inspiration and the abstract, think maybe we should talk about it like it's, you know, when that spark feels dim and what we can do in those particular minutes.
Charisse Deschenes (01:33)
that the hardest part about the day is like today is it's the pressure to be on to be clear and productive and creative and all the things that you you want to show up for when you feel your best and when I can't summon that spark I feel guilty that I'm falling short you know ⁓
Kellye Mazzoli (01:54)
Sure.
Charisse Deschenes (01:56)
And I guess like sometimes that is the most human thing is to really admit it to you, right? I'm tired. I don't feel inspired, but I'm still here, you know? And for me, the inspiration, it weighs heavy when the world also is feeling heavy when, you know, news and all the things are overwhelming and the pace of life really leaves us at this moment where we're
We don't feel like we can breathe as much. And I know I'm not alone in that. So many people live in that constant cycle, the chaos, pushing through, carrying on, rarely pausing to ask, what does inspiration even look like for me right now? So, but I was thinking, Kellye, I have a question for you around this.
Kellye Mazzoli (02:36)
Mm-hmm.
Charisse Deschenes (02:43)
When you hit those blah days, what helps you hold yourself with grace instead of judgment?
Kellye Mazzoli (02:49)
Well, what really helps me is sort of remembering that inspiration isn't something that I can force. It means that I have to actually create the conditions for that. I have to create some conditions usually to sort of quiet my mind. And for me, that might be as simple as taking a little walk outside, like in the morning. I love it whenever the air is crisp.
So I got to experience that more in Washington than I do now in New Orleans, but that nice crisp morning air I really like. But really honestly, the warmth from being outside, it just sort of helps ground me and just walking and having that pace and having that time to myself. The other thing I do every morning whenever I wake up, well I have two Shiba Inus as you know.
and they're so cute and they're so fluffy. And so I make it a point to give each one of them hugs and kisses and belly scritches. And that's what I say to them every morning. So I like that. That helps sort of inspire me whenever I just see how happy they are. And I have one that's very excited whenever he wakes up to see me, even though he slept in the bed with me all night. It's like we were apart and he's so happy that I'm home. And it's just...
I find that inspiring, I try to take a moment to really ground in that and to feel it and to appreciate it and to smile at my dogs and to give them those pets in that time, even if it's just for a couple of minutes as I'm sort of getting out of bed. And then my other routine really is honestly like a warm cup of coffee, which I mean, you always see me on every podcast drinking my coffee. I'm sort of obsessed with it, but.
There's something about like a warm cup of coffee, a hot cup of coffee with my heavy cream in it. That's just exactly what I need to sort of set the tone for the day. And on occasion, I'll light a little candle if that's what I need, that little spark, just those really tiny things that bring me some joy. so yeah, when I'm not really feeling inspired, I know that these are the times where I need to do those things to take care of myself and to give myself, I guess we'll call them like little soul snacks.
Little bitty soul snacks Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So.
Charisse Deschenes (04:57)
Soul snacks. I love soul snacks. And I will say that
like seeing you with your coffee, I I make my coffee too, but I also, so, but I feel like I can almost smell your cup of coffee when you're holding it in your hand. looks so frothy and yummy. such a good thing.
Kellye Mazzoli (05:05)
haha
Yeah, like, yes, it's so good.
And so it's really about sort of like ground, grounding in those things and recognizing them for what they are, like not doing them haphazardly, but whenever I'm feeling a little dim or uninspired, you know, the answer to your question is, like, I try to be even more present in those teeny tiny things, not the big things, but the small things.
So I do think inspiration sort of comes in sparks. Maybe it's a phrase in a book or a lyric for me. I will find a lyric in a song that I'm listening to and it just gets the feeling that I'm feeling and it just makes me feel the emotion. And that's how I sort of light up again. Sometimes it's like the way that the light hits the trees.
It's sort of, I love to sit out back in my backyard. I've got these big overhanging trees. And when the sun is coming through in the afternoon, there's like a sparkle effect in the shade. So it's like shady, even though it's hot here, because it's always hot and humid, but it's like shady. then the sun coming through it, it's just like this very, it's very peaceful to me. And it's like these things aren't.
It's not a big lightning bolt or anything, but they really help reorient me and remind me that I'm here and I'm alive and I'm present on this planet and I just try to really enjoy them. Yeah, I guess I give myself permission to notice those small things and it doesn't really feel like inspiration is so far away, it's not, inspiration isn't about chasing. I kind of have to remind myself it's not about chasing these great.
grand ideas, but it's more about noticing what's already there and what's sitting in my heart, like just really connecting into it. Yeah.
Charisse Deschenes (07:03)
Do
feel like sometimes those are the moments, you know, when you're feeling kind of down and maybe uninspired like I am today, it feels harder to harder maybe to access those on good days. You know, the music, the little soul snacks that you mentioned seem easier to to reach out and grab. And just having this conversation with you right now is kind of inspiring me a little bit. I will admit, yes.
Kellye Mazzoli (07:26)
Yay!
Man, I love it. You know, we've talked a lot about Creativity and we've talked a lot about community for you being a spark for you Could you maybe share a little more about that because I think that might be helpful for some, know for me It's a little tiny soul snacks. But for you it really is about like your creativity and your community. Those are Those are themes that I see with you a lot
Charisse Deschenes (07:43)
Yeah.
Yeah, the small, I mean the small little things that I do, like just thinking about taking the time to draw.
crochet, all the things that I've mentioned before, the journaling. Sometimes I'll take on a little, I'll look up a, give me a random prompt to write about because I feel like it takes me somewhere that I wasn't expecting when I really get down to, you know, journaling, which is kind of fun for me. It brings out that creative side of it. And I also put on the music. I like to listen to instrumental music or instrumental hip hop, just something that doesn't have like someone singing because I feel like that puts me in that
Kellye Mazzoli (08:28)
Mm-hmm.
Charisse Deschenes (08:29)
low state when I work. But it's, you're right, it's just like setting, setting it up so that you can, it's a deliberate activity is what I mean by that. Like I put myself in that
position so that I feel like I'm more inspired and creative to do the work for the rest of the day. And some days I'm really, really good about that, some days I'm not so good and I can tell the difference when I don't take the time to do something just a little bit creative before I get into the rest of the work. And then I would say like, you know, you asked me about community and I really enjoy
people watching, you know, have that urban planning background. And I think that just comes natural to see and the city management part too, just to watch people interact, especially when you know that they're in that third space and that someone designed that for.
people to gather and this summer we took a little time to go out to some of the concerts on the the dock here in Port Townsend and one of them I mean I think there were like 700 people all you know all ages all walks of life everyone just enjoying the music some people dancing eating at the beer garden on the playground on the beach in the water it was just everywhere um and that is an inspiration to me to see like that
Kellye Mazzoli (09:26)
Mm.
Yeah.
Charisse Deschenes (09:42)
society kind of connecting back, you ⁓ Yeah. Yeah?
Kellye Mazzoli (09:45)
Yeah, we do a lot of that here in New Orleans. are, there's always music, there's
always just, and people just come together and there's no like expectation of it being this big grand thing. just, it just is. We just show up and we just hang out and dance and have a good time. It's a lot of fun.
Charisse Deschenes (10:07)
No expectation what you said. It's just like being there in the moment.
So I opened today's episode and I was talking a little bit about how uninspired I was feeling, right? And, you know, if inspiration is everywhere, why does it feel so scarce sometimes? And for me, I think...
know, like I said earlier, heaviness, busyness, overconsumption, not feeling 100 % myself if I feel ill or something like that. But I think that we all struggle with technology also flooding our attention. And if I'm honest, sometimes it's fear, because true inspiration might ask me to take a risk that I was putting off or to step into something unknown.
And I've had that experience a number of times while writing for the podcast. I want to share something, but maybe I don't want to share too much. But it's a real thing. Like when you really get down to it, inspiration and fear and all the things that come along in your life when you're trying to create something new. But
Kellye Mazzoli (10:59)
Mm-hmm.
Charisse Deschenes (11:07)
What I've learned is that naming that block loosens its grip. And when I admit that I'm not inspired right now, it's actually creating that space, as I mentioned, for that inspiration to return. So.
Kellye Mazzoli (11:12)
Mm-hmm.
think. Doesn't it sort
of tie back into the name of our podcast with the unmuted? Like are you feeling a little muted?
Charisse Deschenes (11:27)
Yes,
I, yeah, great. Kellye, great. I think that's great. Yes, I do feel a little bit muted sometimes. And I think, wait, who's unmuting, you know, who's muting me, right? Is I'm muting myself here. Well, I can say, I can say anything. Unmute yourself. Yeah. So I have a question for you. What do you think blocks people most about feeling inspired?
Kellye Mazzoli (11:30)
Yeah.
Yeah. Who? Yeah. Right?
That's why we say unmute yourself.
Charisse Deschenes (11:53)
today's world? That's a big question.
Kellye Mazzoli (11:56)
but that's such an easy answer. It's all the noise. It's all the noise. It's all, and it's so funny because this is something that I'm actually working on with my content and the direction of my program, which is all about noise. I mean, it's both literal and figurative. I think it is that we are constantly.
Charisse Deschenes (12:01)
that's, yeah.
Kellye Mazzoli (12:21)
scrolling and consuming and comparing, that I think that it sort of drowns out the inspiration or just everything that we're taking in, it causes a sort of fragmentation and we're sort of pulled in all these different directions all the time, whether it's coming from social media, it's coming from the community, it's coming from...
seven different council members, right? They all pull you in different directions and your staff and your home and all of the things. And there's a lot of noise in today's society. And I think it creates a level of dissonance, which is another way of just saying like, disharmony, right? Where things aren't aligned anymore because there's so much of it. It's not organized in our brains anymore. So.
Charisse Deschenes (12:47)
All right.
Kellye Mazzoli (13:11)
That's where I think like a lot of inspiration sort of you would think that having all of these inputs might help spark more inspiration. But I think for some of us when there's too much noise, it actually dims us some. And so I think we have to turn down the noise and it's through the stillness. It's through the rituals. It's through those little soul snacks, soul snacks and the honesty, right? Like that's how it.
That's how you get those sparks to return is through the grounding and through harmonizing the noise, I guess is a good way to sort of say it. I really don't think inspiration is like a constant, right? So if you're thinking about like, it's not a constant flame, there is an ebb and a flow to inspiration. You cannot be inspired a thousand percent of the time.
So on some days I think we're gonna glow really, really bright, or at least in my experience there are days where I glow really, really bright and I'm just like so full of it. And then there are some days whenever maybe it's just sort of a flicker. I think really what matters most though is that we stay open to it. Even whenever it feels really far away, stay open to it. It's not gone, it's not that you're never gonna get close to it again, it's just.
you're just not as close right now in this moment and that's okay.
Charisse Deschenes (14:30)
So far away sometimes you're right. And maybe you know the most inspiring thing we could do is to show up honestly when we have those moments and those seasons and I think you know I already said just admitting it is I don't feel right right in this moment and trust like you said that that is going to return and that honesty connects us more.
deeply than any performance or brightness ever could. So being honest, giving yourself a little bit of that time and you know to step back. I think that's so important. And you know we've talked a lot about this today and I think that to bring us to kind of a close today we can talk a little bit about some maybe some takeaways, little few carry-offs. You know, no pressure.
Kellye Mazzoli (14:59)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's good to know.
Like, here are the things that you should carry with you.
Charisse Deschenes (15:21)
Yeah, yeah, take these with you. Maybe this one is a good one. It's okay to feel uninspired. Survival is not failure and the spark not.
Kellye Mazzoli (15:29)
Yeah, I mean, I gotta
say, survival is not failure. In fact, your brain will tell you that survival is like the only thing, the main thing. It is the one success. The fact that we're still here breathing, the fact that you get to feel uninspired is actually a success, even if it doesn't feel like it. Yeah, anyway, yeah, survival's not failure. I love that.
Charisse Deschenes (15:44)
Yeah, that is a success. yeah.
and that, yeah, your spark is going to ebb and flow. So that's kind of the first part of that. And then look at some small sparks. Number two, a song, a walk, a child's wonder, ordinary moments that can be extraordinary fuel. So just remember that when you're
Kellye Mazzoli (15:54)
Mm-hmm.
Charisse Deschenes (16:06)
you going through your ordinary day and you think you might not be feeling inspired and then you find yourself caught in this moment of like joy or just, you know, it's a moment of awe. Maybe you are inspired in a way that you didn't really think about. then number three, honesty creates connection saying I'm not inspired right now. It's self a powerful act. So it gives others permission to be real too, in that moment. ⁓
Kellye Mazzoli (16:19)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, it stops
holding people to like this high expectation of always being inspired all the time. And that's just not realistic. Life is seasons. There are ebbs and flows in every cycle of life. Why wouldn't inspiration be any different? It's not. It is. It's an ebb and a flow. So I love the honesty. And I would say too, is that whenever you're saying something along the lines of I'm not inspired, it's not just period. It's not, I'm not inspired.
Charisse Deschenes (16:36)
Yeah.
Kellye Mazzoli (16:57)
It's I'm not inspired just right now. Just right now. Just in this moment. And that can change. Right? There's room there for that to change. So I really want to say to the audience, like if you're listening and you're feeling dim, if you're feeling tired, if you're feeling blah, sort of like Charisse has been feeling, I'm going to say this to Charisse and I'm going to say this to all of you, that you are not broken. It's human. You are human.
Charisse Deschenes (17:03)
Yeah. Yeah.
Kellye Mazzoli (17:27)
The spark will return. There is an ebb and a flow. So just what goes down comes right back up. So just keep showing up though as you are and make sure to remind yourself that you're not broken, that this is okay. And I think that if you need like maybe a single action to sort of walk away with to help you spark that fire again, I would say simply ask yourself, what is a way that I can unmute myself today, right now?
Charisse Deschenes (17:55)
I love that Kellye. Yes, I love it. And thank you. feel maybe a little bit more inspired just talking in this conversation today. I unmuted. So thanks for being here today, everyone. We'll see you next time. right here.
Kellye Mazzoli (17:56)
That's what I got.
Well, because you unmuted, Charisse.
