Charisse Deschenes (00:31)
Hello and welcome to Unmuted. Today we're doing something a little bit different. It isn't a deep dive into a leadership episode. It's a holiday conversation it's about how real people actually live the season and what it quietly teaches us about leadership.
Hello, Kellye. I feel very festive in my green and red.
Kellye Mazzoli (00:52)
Hi, Charisse. I was gonna say, you are
in your element. This is the conversation for you. Like, I love it. I love it.
Charisse Deschenes (01:06)
⁓ Me too. So what we're going to do is interview each other and kind of go back and forth. And today we're starting with a question for you, Kellye. Are you ready?
Kellye Mazzoli (01:17)
I am but I have to point out before you ask me, for those who are just listening and they don't get to see how festive you look, you are in the most beautiful green shirt with a red scarf and a crocheted beanie that is red as well. so anyway, so just want to, you know, set the stage for those who aren't looking at the video.
Charisse Deschenes (01:20)
Mm-hmm.
you
Well,
and you're wearing a lovely green sweater yourself. any opportunity we can stay warm during the holiday season, I think is where we need to go with that,
Kellye Mazzoli (01:50)
Absolutely, I'm with you. Okay, let's kick off. Let's go. I'm ready now. All right.
Charisse Deschenes (01:51)
Okay, are you ready? Okay, all right.
Well, so the first question is when the holidays are at their best for you, what does that actually look like in real life, not the Instagram version?
Kellye Mazzoli (02:05)
man.
Yeah, no, actually, the Instagram version is very stressful. Right. That picture perfect worthy moment that gets put up on Instagram. So the cool thing about it, though, is that for some of you, know that my husband, my partner loves to take pictures and he's a photographer in his in his not day job. And so he takes really great pictures.
So I don't have to worry about the Instagram version. But, you know, I would say if I'm thinking about the best kind of holiday for me, it really depends on the season. So it's, you know, and I know that sounds weird because it's like it's the holiday season. Well, it really just depends for me. So I think there are some years where I find that I'm really craving something quiet and just peaceful and at home and really just kind of maybe not even planned or maybe it's just planned to not do anything.
Charisse Deschenes (02:30)
Nice.
Okay.
Kellye Mazzoli (02:57)
and I'm at home and I like to cuddle up. am very much a, I like the, the hygge stuff was really awesome. Whenever it came out for me, I like my candles and I like my blankets and I like my comfy couch and I like to read and I like to journal and I just picked up crocheting. So this holiday season is a little bit quieter for us. We're not traveling. and, and for once my husband isn't deployed. So that's really, really nice for me over this, this Christmas holiday and the holiday season.
Charisse Deschenes (03:14)
Yeah.
Kellye Mazzoli (03:25)
because I don't always get that and I haven't over the past 12 years of marriage. but sometimes though it's really social. So I have to say like, it really kind of depends. I've had just some incredible holidays. I'm thinking back to a Thanksgiving that we had before we moved up to Washington state. And I mean, we probably had like almost 50 people who came through on Thanksgiving through the house. And we just had this big luxurious.
Thanksgiving feast that I prepared along with help from many others and some side dishes from people. And we had the big beautiful table and the big beautiful spread. So, you know, and sometimes we we travel. So last year we were traveling and we went with my my husband's dad to a cabin up in Georgia along with his sisters and close family. And so that was kind of cool. So, yeah, so we kind of do a little bit of everything. And I would just say.
that I think that depending on the year and depending on what has happened in the season that I'm personally in, sometimes my holidays look very different. And I think that I recharge maybe differently depending on the different year. So I don't think there's a single right way to do it. And I don't think there's like a best necessarily. I think it's just what's best for me in that moment. it's never about perfection. Let me just say that.
Charisse Deschenes (04:29)
Right.
Kellye Mazzoli (04:40)
It really just has to be no matter what, as long as it's really honest. And like I said, I mean, even though I had probably an Instagram worthy Thanksgiving years back before we left Texas, because everybody was celebrating us because we were getting ready to move in like two weeks. So it was just a really beautiful time to connect with friends and family. And it was just a really amazing time that even though that was probably the most Instagram worthy holiday that I had, I have no pictures from it.
Charisse Deschenes (04:47)
Mm-hmm.
Kellye Mazzoli (05:06)
I just have my memories that I love, so.
Charisse Deschenes (05:06)
Right. You just
made me think about that. Like just Thanksgiving I have no pictures from it either. And I think you're really pointing something out. You're so busy and you're in the moment. Like, what about Instagram? Forget about that. It's just about being with the people that bring you joy. that's, I don't know. That sounds like a wonderful holiday that you had without Instagram.
Kellye Mazzoli (05:20)
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, for sure.
But sometimes it's cool whenever you get that really cool picture for Instagram that captures sort of the essence of the moment of your holidays. So yeah, I mean, think it's all of the above, Charisse. that's my answer. My best holidays are all of the above.
Charisse Deschenes (05:41)
Yeah. Well, well, what you
really make me think about from like the leadership lens is really that, you know, leaders recharge in different ways and there's no single right way to spend your holidays or rest. And you are really modeling authenticity. It's not really a modeling of perfection. You're just living your life and enjoying the moment. So I think that.
Kellye Mazzoli (05:51)
Mm-hmm.
Charisse Deschenes (06:06)
A holiday with Kellye sounds like a wonderful holiday to me.
Kellye Mazzoli (06:10)
And I think
that's sort of you, you sort of glossed over it without putting the label on it. But the label is present being present. So whenever I think back, the holidays that I remember the most are the ones that I just really like allowed myself to be present and to enjoy without having to overproduce or or or people, please. Like, that's the other thing, too, is sort of dropping all of that and just being really present with where I'm at and and letting the day be the day.
Charisse Deschenes (06:16)
Hmm.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Kellye Mazzoli (06:37)
So let's talk a little bit about how most of us carry traditions that I think what I found for me is that those traditions have sort of changed and evolved as my life has changed and evolved with moving, with my family, know, dynamics and, you know, getting a partner and all of the things.
And if I'm thinking about it too from like a professional lens that there are leadership seasons as well that do that sort of same thing, that those seasons change with us as we change. So my question for you, Charisse, is what's a holiday habit that you've kept even as you've gotten older? And even better, maybe there's one you've completely outgrown. Do any come to mind?
Charisse Deschenes (07:21)
Let's see.
Well, you know, I think, yeah, so I would say like when I was younger, I tried to make everything perfect, the perfect gift for every person. And it was, you know, all about the shopping and the trying to get everything out on time. I, you know, I've talked about it before. I have a very large family.
Kellye Mazzoli (07:42)
Mm-hmm.
Charisse Deschenes (07:42)
And
it's really difficult to find just the perfect gift. And what I really learned is it's a value of the time spent together, which I think we all know in some way. But some of like that habit of like having to get everybody a gift and everything, it's really turned into let's spend some time together. And of course, the kids, all the nieces and nephews, they still get all their gifts and things like that. But really that time with like
family and friends. I'm trying to intentionally make more time for like the people and even when I travel, I've been trying to like reach out to different friend sets or groups of people and spend a little time more intentionally with them instead of like just the gift giving kind of thing. So hopefully they appreciate that time together.
Kellye Mazzoli (08:15)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah. Well, OK, so.
So first of all, having been on the receiving end of some of your gifts over the years, because we've known each other that long, not necessarily around the holidays, but but whenever I get those, I have to say, Charisse, you are one of the best gift givers.
Charisse Deschenes (08:39)
Yeah.
Yeah.
Kellye Mazzoli (08:48)
you are so creative and personal with what you've given me at least. Maybe I can't talk about the gifts you've given to others, but I assume they're along the same line. So first, I have to say, you knocked that out of the park. So any gift from Charisse, I think is amazing. And then the second thing I want to say is that, I mean, I sort of gave up the gift giving at specific times of the year. So...
Charisse Deschenes (08:48)
⁓ huh.
thank you.
Yeah
Kellye Mazzoli (09:12)
What I mean by that is that I'm not like, I have to get a gift and send it on Christmas to every single person I know. Or, know, it's somebody's birthday, so they have to get a gift on this one single day. And so instead of putting that on me, what I do is I leave myself open throughout the year that whenever I come across something that reminds me of somebody, then I'm able to, or if something comes up, you know, if there's a spark, but I leave the gift giving to when I actually get sparks of like,
Charisse Deschenes (09:33)
Yes, yes.
Kellye Mazzoli (09:41)
this person is going through a transition. They would really like, you know, maybe a little care package or whatnot, but I don't put that same gift giving pressure on myself either. And I just sort of like let it go. And I don't know, maybe my family is really upset with me because I don't give gifts anymore, at least not in the traditional sense. But I'd like to think that they're a little more special coming, like they just kind of show up randomly.
Charisse Deschenes (09:46)
Yeah.
We know it's not about that at all. And I respect that. Yeah.
Kellye Mazzoli (10:06)
I think my favorite one is I have somebody who was promoted that's been a part of my life for a long time, but she got a promotion. I'm very excited for her. And I happen to know she's a Swiftie and I found one of those paper dress up Swiftie dolls. So it's like all of Taylor Swift's like famous outfits and you dress the paper doll. So an adult, I said that because I know that she was going to love it. it's I mean, it did end up.
Charisse Deschenes (10:25)
Yes.
Yeah.
Kellye Mazzoli (10:33)
corresponding
with this thing that was happening in her life at the same time. So sometimes they happen, but yeah. The gift giving thing is, something, it can really take over a holiday. And I think that's what you're sort of describing is that when that becomes the whole point of the holiday, then what is the point? Is it just things?
Charisse Deschenes (10:44)
Yeah.
Yeah, right.
You're just rushing around and it's really not about the time for sure. And I really appreciate that. You said that about the presence and I always think there are moments in time where I'm just like, somebody is just going to love this thing and I have to send it to you. So I feel you right there. think that that's and then you're hopeful. You're hoping you like you picture them using the Swiftie. It's so fun. Yeah, I love that.
Kellye Mazzoli (10:56)
Yeah.
I do, yes. Specifically with our daughter.
I'm very excited to get pictures of that
Charisse Deschenes (11:17)
you
So thinking about like fun memory lane a little bit, let's normalize the fact that the holidays are not always polished and calm. And I was thinking about this question for you and tell me if it's not the one you want to answer, but
Kellye Mazzoli (11:19)
go.
Charisse Deschenes (11:36)
What's a holiday moment where things absolutely did not go as planned and you were caught, like maybe you can laugh about it now, but like there's a little bit of hint of like, that was so bad.
Kellye Mazzoli (11:48)
Okay, so this is a total cop-out answer, but when is there a holiday that things go as planned? I'm not sure that I have that level of control over my family or my life or all of the circumstances that could happen. So I think, you know, I would say.
I mean, I'm able to go, like I keep the fun memories and the laughing memories and those are the ones that I bring up first and foremost whenever I think back on my holiday experiences and not all of them have been 100 % wonderful. whenever you're getting a whole bunch of humans together, like it's.
Charisse Deschenes (12:13)
Mm-hmm.
Kellye Mazzoli (12:24)
something's gonna happen. But here's what I think, ⁓ more importantly now, whenever I think about the holidays, like I let go of this idea that everything had to be so planned.
that everything had to be so perfect. We were talking about perfectionism earlier. And so I would say like on a serious note, on a leadership level, like really at that core, ⁓ that man, it's so much more fun whenever you're just present and you just let the day be the day. Like it doesn't have to be the perfect spread on the table. mean, okay. So I will say for Thanksgiving this year, we ended up having a ham. We don't do ham. And if we do ham, it's not at Thanksgiving. That's usually more of a Christmas-y sort of thing.
although we prefer like we'll do like a prime rib usually for Christmas, to be honest. So ham really isn't what we normally do. But so my husband and all of his infinite wisdom was at the store. They had these hams. He's like, I think I'm going to smoke a ham this year. Great. Well, we were supposed to be doing Thanksgiving or Friendsgiving this year, a really low key one. And the the other couple was going to be bringing the turkey. Well, they.
Charisse Deschenes (13:29)
Okay.
Kellye Mazzoli (13:30)
forgot So we ended up without a turkey. it didn't go as planned, but I will say this, but we had ham, so it was perfect. And that's the thing. oh my gosh, we had a Thanksgiving without a turkey. I don't think I've had a Thanksgiving without a turkey my entire life. You know, over four decades of Thanksgiving turkeys, and this will be the first year that I actually did not have a turkey.
Charisse Deschenes (13:35)
But you had ham, like...
Yeah.
Kellye Mazzoli (13:52)
I could be upset about that, like, man, we missed out on the turkey tradition, or I can just kind of go like, hey, but this year we had smoked ham and it was pretty awesome.
All right. Charisse, what's a holiday moment that that still makes you laugh every time you think about it? Like, I got to know, do you have something that just makes you crack up? Because I feel like I mean, you have two very different sides of your family. And so I know that they offer a lot of levity.
Charisse Deschenes (14:03)
Mm-hmm.
Yes. Yeah.
yeah, so yeah, by Washington side, we always plan to do like a goofy thing. So if a couple of them, ⁓ you know how the, you do the games and there were, you know, you get the solo cup and you put it on a string and there was one where you had to like wear it around your waist and flip something up and just seeing everybody. And my husband's side of the family do that, like your father-in-law, your mother-in-law, was that, just do it.
Kellye Mazzoli (14:24)
Nice.
my goodness, everybody's walking around with red solo cups tied around their
waist.
Charisse Deschenes (14:44)
Yeah, doing the goofy moves. So you can tell how people can dance really well that way. So there's always a fun game on that side of the family. And I really just enjoy the silliness. And one year, my sister-in-law was coordinating us doing two-stepping, because she was teaching a two-step class. So we're all in the living room two-stepping. another one from my side of the family, the one that comes up every Christmas is
Kellye Mazzoli (15:04)
Nice.
Charisse Deschenes (15:10)
So on when my grandmother was living, we had our family Christmas. was the tradition is family Christmas breakfast. So show up anytime from 8 a.m. to 11 and you can get your breakfast. And then following breakfast is the time where we would open gifts and we would all exchange names. But my grandma would always have gifts for the grandkids and there were like 13 of us. And it starts the tradition is that you start with the youngest.
And then you end with the oldest of the family opening the gifts. And so my grandmother, you know, was born in the 1920s and she kept everything. her heart. mean, every little plastic bag was cleaned, a place for everything. She had the neatest setup and she always had something that you needed. So she would also save all the Christmas boxes and all the Christmas bows. And I remember my brother, Chris, he's younger than me. He was probably about four, three or four.
Kellye Mazzoli (15:50)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Charisse Deschenes (16:05)
And he wanted something I can't even remember at what point in time. It's probably like 1986 or something. So, you know, think about Top Gun came out that year. So probably something relating to planes and I don't know. So he has this idea and had this gift he really wanted. And my grandma's gift came out and he opens it up and he just starts crying. And we're like, what? Well.
Kellye Mazzoli (16:16)
Hahaha.
Charisse Deschenes (16:31)
My parents go over and they look at the box and it says Thumbelina. And so Thumbelina was this doll that came out, I don't know, in the 70s or 80s or something. And Christopher thought he got the Thumbelina doll and he's like, I don't want a Thumbelina doll.
Kellye Mazzoli (16:48)
⁓ he needed to open the box, didn't he?
Charisse Deschenes (16:48)
and starts crying, just crying and they're like, no, no, just
open it. So he opens the box and of course, whatever the gift was, but like, you know, because it's center stage and everybody goes in order, you know, you're all you're you're being watched. And so, so even today, I mean, he still gets the joke about the Thumbelina box and it stayed in the family for quite some time and then went somewhere. And I always think I wish I could find like online somewhere this
Kellye Mazzoli (17:03)
Everybody's watching. how funny.
Charisse Deschenes (17:17)
like an old Thumbelina box and give him a gift. But yeah, it was, it brings joy talking about that. And Christopher, if you're listening, I love you.
Kellye Mazzoli (17:22)
That's amazing.
Ha
But still, it's nice to laugh. And I think that's important
to have these times and the humor. It just helps with resilience.
Okay, so let's shift a little bit from personal into more professional. And I want to talk about December at work, maybe end of November and into December at work with its own ecosystem, right? So I think leadership really does show up differently here than any other time of year. So I was just wondering when you were in local government, Charisse, what did
Charisse Deschenes (17:45)
Okay.
Kellye Mazzoli (18:01)
What did that last week of November and all of December, what did that actually feel like inside your organizations that you worked for?
Charisse Deschenes (18:08)
Yeah, think, I would say that seemed to be a time that things were getting quieter because most of the work for the year had come to completion and you were finalizing projects. A lot of times the last city council meeting of the year will get canceled. And so a little bit time for, know, celebration there too. You want to have fun with your staff and play games. And I know that we've
had holiday games in the past and just a little bit something more for those people that aren't taking that time of year off. I remember office games one year, going way back when I was just a baby urban planner, back in the days of paper plan sets, there was no one in the building and we happened to be on the third floor and I'm adding some people here, but.
we decided that we would play plan set bowling on our break. And we had these long hallways. so this is just getting a little outside of the box. And it's definitely not something a leadership lesson per se, but I was just reflecting on we, can't remember how we did it, but these plan sets were this thick and they made, I mean, they were heavy and they would make a lot of sound if they fell over just one of them. And every now and again, you'd hear a
thud, you know, during the regular time of year. We set up a bunch of them and I can't remember what we rolled down the hallway, but we were knocking those things over and somebody else that happened to be in the building at, I may be on the second floor, which is where the city manager's office and the legal team, all of them are in finance, happened to come up because they were irritated about all the thud, thud going on in the, in the building. So, yeah, no.
Kellye Mazzoli (19:36)
⁓
And
let me guess, they partook.
Charisse Deschenes (19:48)
You know, we did invite,
I think, them to partake, but, you know, maybe they didn't have their work done. Yeah. Anyway, so I think what my reflection is of that is, you know, really the, there is that time that you're really focused and you're in the weeds and you're working long, long hours. And I think the holiday season maybe slows down a little bit and you find different ways to team build with your fellow teammates and really just enjoy each other as well. So I.
Kellye Mazzoli (19:53)
Maybe stopped.
Charisse Deschenes (20:16)
I think that that takeaway for me was, you know, there's time for the focus and intention and also, you know, just give yourself a little bit of space to have a little fun too. So that's how I feel about it. Kellye, I have a question for you. So if you were thinking about the holidays, what did they quietly teach you about leadership that you didn't expect?
Kellye Mazzoli (20:36)
Well, I would say, I mean, I felt like it was such a great rejuvenating time for me as a leader because it was so quiet at the office. So I actually really like it whenever the office is empty and I can go in there and I can sort of be with my thoughts. And so I use the holiday time. I would typically take off like the entire week of Thanksgiving if I could, just because that seemed to be like one of the best weeks to sort of get out of the office. Most people were.
Charisse Deschenes (21:00)
Uh-huh.
Kellye Mazzoli (21:06)
And then in December, I would come back in and I would organize my office. I would clear my whiteboard because I would write everything on it. And I would just sort of figure out my leadership intentions and the things that for the next year that I was really wanting to do. So I used that last few weeks in December as a time to clean out my inbox, to clean out my files, to really
do a full reset. And I just, and for me, like, I don't, I love that. Like just, just getting to organize things and to sort of put things and sort of a fresh start for the first year, for the first of the year really is, it's kind of my happy place. So for me at the end of the year, it was just like a way to sort of say it like, we did it, we got there, this is awesome. And take some of that time and sort of slow down, right? It's really like slowing down. They talk about being strategic and
Charisse Deschenes (21:33)
Mm-hmm.
Kellye Mazzoli (22:00)
We talk about, you know, thinking through the things that, like how you want to show up in the next year. And this is a great time, I think, to do that. And it's also just, you know, people are a little bit, a little bit tired from maybe all the things that we've gotten done during the year. It's a great time to just like pat yourself on the back. So, but all that urgency sort of, for me, in the organizations that I was in, it always slowed down that month of December. And so I,
Charisse Deschenes (22:16)
Yeah.
Kellye Mazzoli (22:27)
I harnessed that. didn't take the time off necessarily to be at home. I really, really enjoyed that time in the office, to be honest.
Charisse Deschenes (22:36)
Yeah,
well, I want to reflect a little bit. So I'm not all elf on the shelf. I did do a little intentional work to just to reflect appropriately. So if anybody is like looking at me, yeah, I love that. I love how you plan and I love how you like kind of quietly reflect. I think that's really important. Yes, yes, I love it. So. You know, when we talk a little bit about rest and protecting your energy.
Kellye Mazzoli (22:42)
Ha ha.
Hahaha
Charisse Deschenes (23:00)
One of the things that leaders really struggle with the most is giving himself that permission to actually rest. And some of the comments that you just made about, you know, that time where you're spending some time intentionally setting and taking a little beat. What, what, what general, what genuinely helps you reset at the end of each year and what should you do? I'm sorry, not what should you do, but what actually works for you. And that's not necessarily only for.
Kellye Mazzoli (23:26)
Hmm.
Charisse Deschenes (23:28)
you your work, but also in your life.
Kellye Mazzoli (23:30)
Yeah, I'm one of those like right before I go on vacation, I can get a whole lot of stuff done because I like to leave everything as as like done as possible and then come back to it. Like I just feel really good. Like I get this like extra boost of adrenaline. And so it's sort of the same thing at the end of.
the year is one of those times where I'm like trying to reorganize everything and to put things sort of like in their boxes and like make my office pretty and make my inbox pretty and you know, sort of get all those things in line. But that that reset at the end of the year really is something that I've carried outside of city management. And so I'm still I find myself doing that in my own business is sort of going OK, like.
you know, let's reflect back on all of the great things that have happened throughout the year. I mean, I've had some incredible travel experiences, some most for work and then a personal vacation in there as well. So I've been all over the world. I've been to Seoul, South Korea. And so I take a little bit of time to think about that because it felt so long ago, but that was just this year.
Charisse Deschenes (24:35)
Yeah.
Kellye Mazzoli (24:37)
And I went to Lisbon, Portugal, and then recently for business I was able to attend a business mastermind in London, which is the first time I've ever been to London. And so I have all of these amazing experiences. It's not even including ELGL in Santa Rosa and ICMA in Tampa. I mean, there's so many really cool places that I got to visit.
and I had such a good time. So for me, at the end of the year, taking a moment to actually like go back through and really recognize all of the things that we did, even the things that happened all the way back in January or March is really, really important. And that's what I do. And I think that it works because we're so quick to keep moving on and to keep going and to keep growing that we don't always reflect. And so that to me is what I do.
Charisse Deschenes (25:22)
I love that. Can I steal something from that ⁓ for like 2026? So just like, I love how you're keeping track and you're like reflecting on everything. I have a new journal coming. I'm excited about using it. But I was thinking about maybe just weekly, just jotting down some things to be excited about as the year goes on. And maybe next year we can share like some highlights together.
Kellye Mazzoli (25:25)
Please. Yes.
Ooh. Yay.
Charisse Deschenes (25:48)
in our podcast of like, you know, hey, we talked about this last year. Let's, I don't know. I just, think that would be a great time to do some reflection together. Okay.
Kellye Mazzoli (25:54)
Yeah, that'd be really fun. I'd love to do that. Yeah, so I
actually, yeah, I started in 2025. I started the year by writing daily in a five-year journal. So it's a little short snippet, but it's based on like December 1st, you know, like every single day has a little snippet in it.
Charisse Deschenes (26:07)
Yeah.
Kellye Mazzoli (26:14)
And so, and then right underneath that, I'm gonna get to do 2026. And so in all, whenever I'm done with this journal, it'll be five years, know, all my December 1st will be on one page. So I actually have that going and I've been doing it for a year. So I'm ready for you at the end of 2026, whenever you get there. Yeah, yeah, I'm intrigued. So I'm really excited. It'll be my first loop. I've never done this, but it's something that I had read about. And I was like, you know what?
Charisse Deschenes (26:29)
⁓ I need to get mine then so I can do the... Mine's a different type of journal.
Kellye Mazzoli (26:41)
December of 2024, don't we, know, why don't I just commit to it for 2025? you know, and I think that's the other thing too, is that I just have these things that I go ahead and try to commit to for the year. So it was the journaling for 2025. And then I also committed to just like focusing on my food and my health and like my nutrition and what I'm eating. And so I've been doing that for 2025.
Charisse Deschenes (27:04)
Mm-hmm.
Kellye Mazzoli (27:10)
And then for people who follow me on LinkedIn, also do every Monday, I've been posting a money related affirmation. It's really more of a personal journey for me, but I'm sharing it with those that are in my network because who doesn't want a city manager or a city management professional that is confident in their personal financial life too? Like it's, that's, it's a great, it's actually a great thing for us to have both professionally, but also
Charisse Deschenes (27:32)
Right, yeah.
Kellye Mazzoli (27:37)
very much personally. So I've been sort of unraveling these things over 2025 and I'm coming up, I'm almost done. Like I only have a few more weeks to go, you know, it's kind of fun. So yeah.
Charisse Deschenes (27:47)
Yeah, well I follow you there
too and I love reading your Monday morning posts so thank you for sharing that and I know it is like you said for you but ⁓ another person here that enjoys what you put out there so just I'm a Kellye fan.
Kellye Mazzoli (27:53)
Thank you. Yeah.
I love it.
So, so Charisse, what do you do now to protect your holidays? Right. So maybe earlier in the career, maybe you didn't do it. I don't know. But if you know, have you always protected those holidays? Maybe you haven't. Is there something that you do now that you do differently? Anything like that?
Charisse Deschenes (28:13)
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think, you know, for me, I've, in a way, I've always been a holiday protector, depending on, you know, where I am, how busy. I have a very large family that I don't get to see very often in the Kansas area. And so, and then also a very large, not as large, but a large family in Washington. And even though we live here, the water makes things like just two or three hours longer to travel. And so a long time ago, I just...
Kellye Mazzoli (28:28)
I could see that.
Charisse Deschenes (28:47)
of recognize the importance of that and really tried to protect it. But I will say, know, like shifting my career completely also gives me the opportunity to mark time off of my calendar completely and protect that. And then in my personal life, I will say, yes, I've always protected that time for, you know, the family and, but there's also those times where you're like, well, I can't be at this family.
this one's a travel and so you just, get like a little bit overwhelmed and anxious. And I think that it dawned on me, just be where you are, right? Like whatever you're experiencing, be where you are. I try to do one holiday with one family and one holiday with the other. And then the other part of that is with my husband is our anniversary just happens to be on the 28th of December. And so we never.
Kellye Mazzoli (29:34)
Let's just throw one more thing in there. That's
great.
Charisse Deschenes (29:39)
Yeah, I mean, it's rare that we like just intentionally plan something for our anniversary when it is our anniversary. We have managed to do like a day or something like that. But I think I'm good at that. And I don't think that the rest of the year, maybe I follow it that way. But yeah, the holidays are important to me and I protect it.
Kellye Mazzoli (29:57)
That's interesting. So it's almost like in your personal life by sort of how you navigate the holidays, you're able to set boundaries and practice that skill, which is something that I think all of us need in leadership too. let's look ahead. We're only a couple weeks out from the new year. And I think
Charisse Deschenes (30:15)
Yeah.
Kellye Mazzoli (30:17)
I mean, you and I have had this discussion a few times how important it is to not necessarily to have resolutions. In fact, I would say we're not doing resolutions this year, but we do sort of gentle direction for me. You know, I call it intention. And so guess I was just wondering when you think about the year ahead for 2026, what exactly is it that you are most excited about without needing to plan it?
Charisse Deschenes (30:31)
Mm-hmm.
Well, I mean, well, it's a big year for me. I a big birthday coming up. But also, I know, I know. So maybe we'll need to plan a little bit because I don't want to just be stuck here for my birthday. But as far as the business side of things, I'm really excited about. I'm building the coaching business. I'm adding more and more to it. I'm planning to launch that in 2026 early.
Kellye Mazzoli (30:42)
Let me add that caveat.
Yeah.
Charisse Deschenes (31:11)
So what I'm excited about is like where that leads me a little bit. And then I'm not planning, but I'm thinking about also that next step of what that business morphs into, like working with people in groups and workshops and things like that in the future. So I haven't put that task down on paper quite yet. It's just something that I've been thinking about a lot. I love that the, you have that opportunity.
Kellye Mazzoli (31:31)
Mm-hmm.
Charisse Deschenes (31:38)
to reflect back on what the year has been, right? And then also I like to brainstorm. I like to have that, the think without putting all the, know, guard rails on anything quite yet. I think that that's what this time of year really gives you that sparkly kind of moment of what could things be?
I have some things that I'm planning with my business. I have some things I'm planning for birthday celebration and they aren't down on paper yet.
Kellye Mazzoli (32:04)
I am planning 2026, but my intention, how I want to show up, I think that that is, you know, it's a word for me. That's.
Charisse Deschenes (32:13)
Yeah, yeah, that's what I was going to say. like if you have like a word or a vibe, ⁓ maybe that emotional tone for you, will, what might that be for 2026?
Kellye Mazzoli (32:18)
⁓ huh. Yeah.
Yeah, so it's funny,
yeah, if I, just kind of off the top of my head, so I haven't like settled on my word yet, but I think it's really leaning towards connection, like a creative connection or a sparkly connection. I mean, I've done a lot of connecting over 2025 in ways that I hadn't done before, and I think I'm just gonna continue that forward. So come 2026, I mean with.
We we just had a whole episode on the membership, the city executive circle, and that really is all about a different mode of connection for people in the profession and for me and how I'm connecting with clients. So I'm really excited about that. also still love my one on one client, so I'm still going to be coaching one on one. But this membership gives a place for for people to come in and to connect. And I want to make it sparkly and I want to make it fun. yeah, so maybe it's not one word, maybe it's a.
Charisse Deschenes (32:56)
Yeah.
Kellye Mazzoli (33:17)
one word with an adjective attached to it. But yeah, I said you said sparkly and that stuck with me. I really like sparkly. So, yeah, yeah. And I'm going to let my intuition guide me, right? You know, so there's a lot of this like I can plan out a lot of stuff, but I can't know 100 % of everything that's going to happen. And so dropping that perfectionism, not letting that fear set in and just sort of going with my intuition as things come up.
Charisse Deschenes (33:19)
Yeah.
Sparkly connection. Yeah.
Kellye Mazzoli (33:42)
That's my planning tool. That's what I plan to use for leadership. So let's create. I'm going to create space versus like creating a long list of goals just sort of stacked on a piece of paper this year.
Charisse Deschenes (33:47)
love that.
bright but
you have that vision and it's without pressure you have that opportunity to just yeah I'm looking forward to your 2026 Kellye and mine too.
Kellye Mazzoli (34:05)
Thank you.
I can't wait to see what you do with your business. think people are really going to benefit from what you're bringing to the table. So I think Lead for Center has some amazing things coming forward and I can't wait to see what those look like for you.
Charisse Deschenes (34:19)
Thank you. So, well, let's end the serious thinking part and just be humans for a few minutes. What do you say?
Kellye Mazzoli (34:28)
Sounds good.
Charisse Deschenes (34:29)
if you had a favorite holiday movie that you never get sick of, what is that?
Kellye Mazzoli (34:35)
I don't think I have a holiday movie.
Charisse Deschenes (34:37)
No holiday movie?
Kellye Mazzoli (34:39)
is a classic. I enjoy it. It's always fun, but I think I could get sick of that one. Let me see. I mean, really honestly, so like I said, a lot of times, a lot of Christmases, my husband's actually been deployed or on detachment, so he hasn't been home. And what I really like to do is curl up with my warm beverage and some candles lit. And I watched pretty much any Hallmark-like sort of movie. That's like my indulgence.
and those types of movies. Like I never get sick of just seeing people enjoy a little holiday cheer, a little holiday lesson, and maybe a little bit of romance. yeah, just that it's always nice. So that I'd say kind of generally, I don't think I would get sick of those sort of hallmark movies. Yeah, yeah. How about you?
Charisse Deschenes (35:26)
They're all fun. They're prescribed. have love
act. Love actually is a movie that I watch over and over and over again, not necessarily with a bunch of people, but like if it's me just on my couch watching something and then Christmas vacation. If I'm watching it with my dad, especially, I just love to see him laugh and then gaps for air. So yeah, that's a good one for old family.
Kellye Mazzoli (35:32)
Mmm.
haha
Love it. Yeah.
So what about like a favorite holiday food?
Charisse Deschenes (35:53)
And let's see. Well, I mean, I think I like there isn't like just one, but there's this cranberry salad that my mom makes and it's probably nothing that anyone else really loves. But it's a it's like a jello based salad with cranberry and walnuts and celery. know an orange and I love it. It's it's crunchy.
Kellye Mazzoli (36:11)
You're making it sound so good right now. Celery, hold on. You threw that celery in there
real quick.
Charisse Deschenes (36:20)
I know, I know it's like crunchy and sweet and tangy and I don't know it I love it so I guess more for me. How about you Kellye? Do you have a favorite food?
Kellye Mazzoli (36:26)
Yeah. Yeah. No, I would try it for sure. It sounds
very interesting. So for me, I mean, my favorite holiday food really is like, I love stuffing, like a really good homemade stuffing, not the kind that you get in the box, but like add in some sausage and you know, gotta have the onions and the celery that have been sauteed, like the whole, you know, all the different types of like breading that go in there, like.
and tons, probably tons of butter, way too much butter. But yeah, that's my favorite holiday food. real just like comfort. It's like a comfort food.
Charisse Deschenes (36:57)
I that. I do love stuffing too, it's tasty. Another quick one, a tradition you secretly don't miss.
Kellye Mazzoli (36:58)
Yeah.
I don't think I have, you know, any that I can think of. What about you?
Charisse Deschenes (37:11)
getting up so early in the morning like four o'clock in the morning like i love i i kind of it's a love hate thing like being a little kid and running up and then waking your parents up and then you're tired for the rest of the day not sleeping in until you know seven o'clock that's a nice thing these days
Kellye Mazzoli (37:18)
Yeah.
Yeah. Is there
anything that makes your December feel like instantly special? Like, ooh, it's here. The season's here. I got one.
Charisse Deschenes (37:37)
Okay, I want to hear it. Okay.
Kellye Mazzoli (37:38)
I do, yeah, it's
peppermint mocha. Like a peppermint mocha is just like, that just yells Christmas. I really miss the sugar-free peppermint mochas at Starbucks. Shout out, give me back my sugar-free peppermint. Yeah.
Charisse Deschenes (37:46)
Yeah.
Shout out Starbucks.
I never thought, yeah, peppermint definitely. And you know those little candles that are kind of, they smell like the evergreen. I'm starting putting those out. ⁓ Yeah, I guess that's one for me and the tree and all the, yeah, all the things. But yeah, yeah, I'm going to have to go look for that peppermint mocha thing later.
Kellye Mazzoli (38:01)
Yes. Mm-hmm. Mm. Yeah, I love that.
Yeah, yeah, very cool.
So good, so good. All right,
well before we close, do you wanna bring it back to leadership?
Charisse Deschenes (38:20)
yeah, let's do that. So as we start to wrap up the holiday season and with this episode, we just want to say thank you for spending time with us. We know the season can feel full in different kinds of ways and we're grateful you chose to make room for our conversation today.
Kellye Mazzoli (38:39)
think a little bit about what kind of leader that maybe you quietly hope to be more of in the coming year. Not necessarily professionally, but personally. Like how do you want to show up at work personally? And you know, what do you hope that people listening will give themselves permission to release from this year?
Charisse Deschenes (38:54)
⁓
Kellye Mazzoli (38:54)
holidays happen to look this year, whether they're busy or they're quiet, celebratory or low key, familiar or completely different, we really hope that you're finding a few moments to feel steady and genuinely, you know, just making the holidays yours.
Charisse Deschenes (39:09)
we do have one more episode coming up before the end of the year, and we're really looking forward to the conversation as a way to close out the 2025 year together.
Kellye Mazzoli (39:18)
And as we look ahead, just a little bit, we also want to share that we will be returning with our next full season in early 2026. We're going to take some intentional space between now and then to rest, create, shape what's next for Unmuted, and to figure out some more of those topics that you really want to hear about from us.
Charisse Deschenes (39:42)
Yeah, and we'll talk much more about that in the final episode of the year. But for now, we just wanted to offer gentle heads up and a lot of gratitude for being part of the community here.
Kellye Mazzoli (39:53)
Yes, thank you for the work that you do, for the way that you show up in your own corners of leadership, for inviting us into your lives through this podcast and taking the time to listen.
Charisse Deschenes (40:02)
wherever you are and however you're spending your next few weeks, we hope it includes some ease and a little quiet and a few moments that feel like a true exhale.
Kellye Mazzoli (40:12)
And we'll be back soon for our final episode of 2025.
Charisse Deschenes (40:16)
And then we'll meet you again in 2026 for the season of Unmuted. Happy holidays.
Kellye Mazzoli (40:21)
Happy Holidays!
